trick or teat

i dressed up as hello kitty for halloween. i was the cutest ever. an $8 headband and some face paint - yellow nose, black whiskers - also makes it one of the cheapest ever.

the office crew

after work, i went by my in-laws just to chat and show off my ridiculously cute alter-ego. i came home 2 hours later with a homemade chicken pot pie. i kind of love being back in hometown.

the lawyer and i recently purchased a small drop-leaf table and chairs. for the first time in over 4 years of marriage, we have a place besides the couch to eat dinner. so, naturally, i force us to eat dinner there as much as i can. unless we're having cheese puffs and/or ice cream for dinner, because then we have dinner on the couch.

i heated up the pot pie and set it in the middle of our table. i set out plates and silverware and poured 2 glasses of wine. since dinner was so fabulous, we didn't talk much during it. but towards the end of the meal, i noticed something.

sidebar - i am anal-retentive, bossy and stubborn.

the lawyer was holding his fork completely wrong. remember how beast held his fork in disney's beauty and the best and tried to slobber down the soup (or whatever) as it fell from his awkwardly-held utensil?

http://media.photobucket.com/image/beauty%20and%20the%20beast/LLSamSam/Gif%20Folder/tumblr_lhi829fY6f1qcetvf.gif?o=17

well, the lawyer wasn't that bad, but he was holding his silverware in the same awkward, scowl-inducing manner.

the lawyer: (oblivious)

kissey: what are you doing?

the lawyer: (still oblivious) what?

kissey: you're holding your fork wrong.

the lawyer: what? (eyes slant)

kissey: (scowling) you're holding your fork wrong. hold it like this. (demonstrates)

the lawyer: it's good. i'm hungry. leave me alone. plus, it's really hard to take you seriously with all that cat makeup on your face.

touche.

dinner plates

this is a 2-part post.

part 1: my dinner menu for the week. if you know me, or have worked with me, or have read any number of blog posts i've written, you know i like lists. my new coworkers love to inspect what i've jotted down or make fun of my non-sensical post-it notes, but i believe it only adds to my inexplicable charm. i like to write. it. down., then cross. it. off. it is a self-satisfying little thing i do. sometimes it causes me anxiety. but in those cases, i simply ignore the list. the real satisfaction comes from seeing activities numbered and printed on a random sheet of paper, and serves as a reminder of my potential. hence, there are many, many half-crossed lists around my house. apparently, i am not living up to my potential.

but tonight, there is a current, running list: our menu. i love a meal plan and accompanying grocery list, although i'm nowhere near as good as thisgirl. girlfriend is rockin' it! but back to me.

(list)

(uploaded from my new blogger app. smartphones are so NEAT.)

i try. i really do. and i have managed to really adhere to my dinner menu so far, so i'll recount it for you here. potential-measuring, if you will.

sunday - toasted gnocchi with pesto, tomatos & goat cheese. simple and yummy

monday - praise-the-braise chicken with feta & tomato. i love a crockpot. i improvised here with canned tomatoes with juice instead of broth and goat cheese.

tuesday - grilled lemon steelhead trout that looks suspiciously like salmon, with rice & brown sugar green beans.

wednesday - tricked-out pepperoni tombstone pizza. usually, it's leftovers, but i ate them for lunch today.

thursday - turkey turnovers. again with the subbing of goatcheese. mainly because i didn't feel like spending $15 on cheese, which is a major accomplishment for me.

friday - this says shrimp pesto pasta, but i'm betting on leftovers OR orange balsamic chicken thighs with spinach.

saturday - out of town. someone feed the lawyer, please.

sunday - this is usually pizza night, but i'm going with shrimp pesto pasta.

monday - leftovers, again usually reserved for wednesday nights.

tuesday - tuna steaks with rice and green beans (2 staples i keep stocked).

wednesday - black bean tortillas with prosciutto, goat cheese, corn and tomatoes.

thursday - pizza.

and that's as far as i've gotten. but i'm impressed with myself.

part 2: tonight's dinner conversation.

me: (mostly yapping about convos with friends while the lawyer gobbles up dinner)

the lawyer: (mostly gobbling while pretending to look interested in things he doesn't care about)

me: did you like it?

the lawyer: mmm, yes baby. really good. (exits table and opens deep freezer.)

me: are you getting ice cream?

the lawyer: yes.

me: what kind?

the lawyer: moose tracks.

me: can i have your wine?

this exchange is a total flip-flop of what normally happens.

secret single behavior, post #2

last night's dinner:

2 small bowls of tuna tomato pasta
2 salads with avocado (1/2 per salad), blue cheese, tomatoes, cucumbers, prosciutto and balsamic vinegar
4 strawberries with cream cheese fruit dip
5 sips of sierra nevada summerfest. i am ashamed i let so much beer remain unconsumed.
4-6 mindless handfuls of goldfish, to round things out.

well, it's better than sunday night's dinner.

sigh

talk about the winter blaaaaaaaaaaaahs. i mean, snow is cool and all, but i am so unequipped to deal with it.

so is the state of mississippi and its resident citizens with drivers' licenses. it took me 30 minutes to drive 7 miles. i passed one wreck immediately leaving our office today, then passed two cars that had recently landed in the ditch on the road in front of our little complex. after that, i decided to ditch my plans for the gym.

immediately after spotting them (and slowing down to about 15 mph), i fishtailed in the white stuff. and while terror gripped me initially and then passed - i was, after all, going 15 mph and it seemed a bit absurd to be scared of slowly rolling off the road into the ditch - i would have been way more embarrassed to be incapacitated 50 yards before turning into the neighborhood.

plus, i really only like it when i'm skiing and there is supposed to be snow. which means, not in mississippi. but it does seem like a good omen for our planned ski trip next year. who wants to go??

so, instead of the gym and instead of payroll, the law student and i spent the afternoon watching 6 feet under in our pajamas. great show. crazy family. then it was leftover crawfish etouffee and msu bulldog basketball.

and if it's gonna snow, i wish we'd get snowed in so work wouldn't be a possibility tomorrow. i could get used to pjs and beer and leftovers and watching everything hbo has ever produced.

THE etouffee recipe

the law student (the esquire, the law graduate, et cetera, et al) is quite the little sous chef. i came home to a huge crockpot of black beans and chopped veggies for my dish of the week: crawfish etouffee. etouffee means "smothered," and i'm thinking it must also mean delish. i never make this stuff the same way every time, because i can never find the same etouffee base or sauce or mix or whathaveyou. ever. mom always made it with a jarred sauce - how convenient. must be one of those magical grocery store items only she can find.

so, per amanda's request, here is last night's recipe. not only was it scrumptious, it was also pretty.

you'll need: butter, 1 chopped red pepper, 1 chopped green pepper, 1 stalk chopped celery, garlic, black beans (canned or homemade), onion, crawfish tails (i use bernard's, in the frozen section at the kroger), tony's seasoning and tony's instant roux, and 1 can of rotel tomatoes.

canned black beans are convenient. whole beans are not, but they are infinitely more tasty. giving a grocery list to a man is almost always a crapshoot, which is how we ended up making our own (awesome) black beans. i will learn this one day. be explicit, or you will come home to a plastic bag full of dried black beans. to avoid having to soak the beans, we threw them in the crockpot. recipe follows.

1. pour boiling water over 1 cup of dry beans in water into crockpot--cover beans, plus about 1 inch. *note - 1 cup of dry beans yields way more than 1 cup of cooked beans.
2. throw in garlic (a few cloves, to taste) and chopped white or yellow onion.
3. 3-4 hours on low (we will probably eat around 7:30 like normal)
4. check every few hours to make sure 1) water level is good (add more BOILING if needed) and 2) to stir. taste test for consistency.
5. congratulate yourself by doing a solo happy dance in the kitchen in your socks.

next, the roux. here's last night's recipe. boil the rice while you are making this.

1. melt 3/4 stick of butter in large pan.
2. throw in chopped veggies - peppers, onion, celery, whatever
3. pour in one can of rotel tomatoes, juice included.
4. sprinkle generous amounts of tony's roux mix into pan. stir. bring to boil. add more as needed to thicken. lower heat when to desired consistency.
5. dump in crawfish tails. stir.
6. spoon in black beans, making sure to get a little of the bean water. stir to mix.
7. you can smother your rice with the etouffee to be super literal, or you can just stir in the rice, like i did. season to taste.

and voila, you now have the prettiest, tastiest crawfish etouffee ever! the colors in this dish look fabulous.

amanda, you're welcome.

3

3 more days left in tax season. this morning, we were instructed not to bother the cpas. it has not really worked out that way. we're all in countdown mode here. because all that other work that has to get done doesn't stop just because it's tax season. and if the phone here never rings again (ha!), it will still be too soon.

yesterday, i worked over 10 hours. i skipped small group and napped on the couch from 5 until 9. in between golden girl episodes, i ate a little dinner: turkey and cheese rollup (one of my staples from college), an apple with peanut butter, some popcorn, and a bowl of cereal. i completely ignored the leftover asparagus and southwest chicken in the fridge. but that's irrelevant. what IS relevant is that the law student didn't bring me dinner from small group.

our small group meets on monday nights. we have dinner together and then bible study. let me drop this disclaimer: i did not ask the law student to bring me dinner. there. i wasn't very hungry by the time he got home, due to my nutritious and organic dinner mentioned earlier, and it wasn't even an issue until we were in bed at 11 pm, and he started talking about the wonderful dinner crystal made. cornbread, corn and lima beans with bacon, twice-baked potato casserole and pork tenderloin...he casually mentioned that had crystal offered a "late plate" for me. "do you want to take a plate to lauren?" "nah, she can fend for herself. she's only worked 10 hours and can't see straight and has a headache. she didn't look one bit pitiful napping on the couch. she doesn't need a good dinner. she had popcorn. and was in a great mood, too!" "why would you not bring me a plate, especially after someone offered it to you???"

thanks, honey.

extended disclaimer:

i love the law student with all my heart. he's my favorite person ever and he always does nice things for me and i don't have a lot of room to complain. his missteps are just funnier to blog about. i've said it before, and i'll say it again: men and women think differently.

friday

kathleen thinks i'm funny. thank you, kathleen.

in other news:

i did make it through yesterday. but i still can't fire that client. and i have to work sunday. i can't wait for april 16th.

the law student and i are now the proud owners of two round-trip non-stop flights to the city of angels! i hope all of our friends are currently underemployed with lots of free time, large extra bedrooms and deep pockets. oh, and los angeles dodgers? you suck for playing out of town in arizona that week.

the law student thinks that upon graduation, he should be called sir. the law student is deluded.

i think my mental state this month is echoed in the physical state of my bedroom. and bathroom. and kitchen. so, i plan to clean this weekend.

i also plan to make dream cookies for april 15th, and later this month for a friend's birthday. corrie, this is your sign that i really do love you.

in addition to all my crazy situations at work, i started this week off with a pregnancy scare. but have no fear, nfp rides again! can i tell you how much our california vacation would have sucked? who has 2 thumbs and wants to be knocked up in la watching their husband and friends party it up while she's puking? not this girl.

i asked the law student to make dinner last night. please note this involves a crock pot (read: you can't screw this up.) here's the email i sent to him:

in crock pot, put (in order):

frozen corn (it's family size, so maybe not all of it)
1 can black beans (drain, rinse, repeat), or 2 if you think we need it
chicken breasts, salted and peppered
chopped garlic (2-3, remaining cloves in the little dish--the small things)
jarred salsa over the top

put on high.

the "drain, rinse, repeat" part stumped him. yes, really. i made dinner.

just thinking about this week makes me want an adult beverage.

thursday night

1. if any of you out there know what an EIN (or FEIN) is, please never never never have more than one business per EIN. it will save you much ill will from your accountant. i don't care what the tax advantages are.

2. food: cwc&s, leftover mac & cheese, an apple, a handful of raisins and a handful of cashews before dinner, roasted salmon with shallots and canned tomatoes over spinach, roasted fingerling potatoes with boursin cheese (omg i love that stuff), a glass of red wine, and one measely, delicious milk dud. after last night's twix encounter, i have emerged victorious tonight. exercise: pilates and 35 minutes of cardio.

3. white jeans and a dan marino jersey. i love 30 rock.

4. i'm sad j. d. salinger died. i have never read the catcher in the rye. i have read franny & zooey, raise high the roof beam, carpenters, and seymour: an introduction. i loved every word of them.

5. my google reader was completely flummoxed today. not one blog update appeared. at all. so tonight, i went around re-following folks. just now all has returned to normal. i still have not managed to un-follow myself.

off to make the bed and get in it.

tuesday dinner

as i munch on my shipley's chocolate-covered donuts of the deep-fried-goodness variety, i'll share with you the recipe for the turkey cutlets i made for dinner last night, which was much healthier than my breakfast of choice. at least i got 2% instead of whole milk this time.


i found this recipe for turkey turnovers from my rachael ray magazine.

you'll need: one pack (about 3-4) turkey cutlets, available in the butcher section of your local kroger usually next to the pre-made kebabs, one can of fire-roasted tomatoes (or a lot of little cherry tomatoes, halved, whichever you prefer, but you might have to add some water in the recipe), one pack chopped frozen spinach (or fresh spinach), one package soft herbed cheese, like boursin, (you can use the regular or the light, but take a look at that calorie/fat content first!), some extra virgin olive oil, salt and pepper, and fennel (which i don't use, cause i usually don't have any).

-defrost the pack of chopped spinach.
-heat the olive oil (a turn of the pan or so) in a large skillet.
-give the cutlets a good pounding to flatten them out and season with salt and pepper.
-place a mound of the spinach and cheese on one side of each cutlet and fold over the other side to make the turnover. secure with toothpicks.
-place turnovers in the heated oil, on medium high, and cook for a few minutes on each side until slightly browned. this can get tricky, so use tongs and don't worry if the stuffing falls out a bit.
-after both sides have cooked, pour in the can of tomatoes and juice (or your little cherry tomatoes and some water).
-bring to a quick boil, then cover and turn down the heat and cook for about 8-10 minutes, or until the turkey is done.

hope you like it!

wondering if i should spring for chocolate donut #3?

yawn

hello, it's your favorite wednesday wussy again! i cannot stay awake to save my life. well, that's actually an exaggeration, obviously. i mean, i'm good, but i'm not that good.

let's get to it, shall we? i have a headache and don't feel much like being witty and charming. i feel like being a wednesday wussy.

i have a headache, cause i'm tired, cause i stay up too late because the law student is underemployed and likes to stay up too late too. got that? which means i so do not want to finish these payrolls and get them off my desk. or add up the subtotal, taxes, shipping and handling and then grand total for my two-year-old wedding photos that i have not ordered yet but told my mom i did. seriously. should it take me three whole evenings to fill out 2 order forms from a pile of pre-sorted, pre-picked-out pictures (that i had to get mom to help with anyway)? didn't think so.

i love (not) that the law student can't make his own salad for dinner and will instead wait for me to do it (which i didn't) and then decide that driving to burger doodle is much more time- and money-efficient. he is just as capable as i to chop vegetables, undo the cap on dressing, fluff his lettuce in a bowl and cut off bits of roasted chicken, but apparently does not know this.

my dog stinks. i've threatened to bathe her since friday, but i think she's on to me.

speaking of stinky, i am mad at dove brand deodorant. let's just walk through my relationships with deodorant, hmmm? i'm like a 6-month dater. i'll use a brand (usually lady mitchum cool dry soft solid) for a length of time and we're GREAT together. then, the magic fades, as does the odor-masking, perspiration-reducing effectiveness, so i'll go and get a new brand, but i always come back to lady mitchum. well, this girl has learned her lesson. in one of my many flings with a new brand, i bought dove (citrus lemongrass scent, i believe) but it did not do it for me. it was still too early to go back to my lady, so i found dove clinical prescription strength (cool cucumber scent) and thought for sure it would work and then some. i'd probably be able to skip days, even. this is not the case. not only does this deodorant instruct you to put it on at night (pshhuh! as if!), it does not work. every time i wave or even type too fast, my nose crinkles.

i'd really like to skip pilates tonight because i'm so tired and my shoulders hurt from yoga. wish i hadn't eaten that burger from handy andy's for lunch. and that sausage egg and cheese mcbiscuit this morning. call me mcgut.

well, it's 3 pm and my timesheet is missing about 2 hours on it. guess i'd better get to making it up.

post with pictures from the weekend coming soon. i miss my friends.

have a wussy wednesday, y'all!